Don’t delay the happy!

I’ve been thinking about this blog post for a while, I haven’t been able to get much sewing done lately and it’s really bothering me.

I love sewing (isn’t it obvious?), but…bone, muscle and joint pain has been limiting me tremendously since mid-January. I have troubles opening bottles (from coke to shampoo), lifting pans, walking, getting out of bed and so many other things that seemed normal. I’ve had other health issues the past few years (some even starting at the age of 10), but this is totally new. It’s hard to get recognition as a young person from doctors. I’ve been through 7 GP’s and numerous specialists the past 17 years, but they always sent me away or diagnosed me with depression…

Then last month I finally found a doctor that listened! And a few days ago I was diagnosed at last. Regrettably with 3 forms of auto immune diseases. After all these years I didn’t really expect such harsh words and it does make me anxious for the future. Apart from daily issues I’ll probably need to deal with, I’m just not sure if I’ll be able to continue to craft and sew. After years of only studying & working and finally re-finding my crafting passion last year, that just seems ironic.

All this made me think. The only reason I ever started sewing was to make myself cotton summer dresses. It’s so hard to find 100% cotton dresses for some reason and I don’t want rayon or silk and definitely not polyester. Ugh. Cotton is much, much needed here in Texas! Guess how many dresses I’ve made so far? None! And it’s already 75+ degrees!

Since August 7th last year -the day I started sewing- I made 70 items, 23 of which I kept myself. That’s definitely not a lot, but more than I can recall! Among them are 2 cat beds, 1 unfinished beach bag, 1 unfinished purple monkey, 2 fabric flowers and some other ‘less interesting’ things. There are so many things I still want to make for myself, apart from the much needed summer dresses: cushion covers, cat toys, tops, skirts, yes even quilts!

For above and below reasons I can’t continue to make (baby) items for others (excl. charity), or I will probably never get to making myself something, because:
- I currently only have about 3-5hours of energy a day (not necessarily pain-free). That includes energy for cleaning and cooking, and my much loved volunteer work. Time is flying and energy even more!
- On (pre-health issues) average a project takes me about 2-3 (half) days to finish, but nowadays that’s probably double.
- Baby things are over-inspiring me. It’s all I ever think about and it’s driving me nuts. I want to make EVERYTHING for every single baby I know and that’s just not realistic anymore with a serious baby boom going on in my circle of friends.

It’s a first, but I need to say it; it’s time for ME.

(C) featured image by Sublime Stitching (honest labels to accompany hard-worked DIY projects)

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2 comments
  1. Heather Feather says: March 19, 20129:16 am

    I’m so sorry to hear about your diagnosis! I’m glad you’ve decided to sew for yourself though. You should sew for yourself! (This coming from a very selfish seamstress.)

    • nienke says: March 19, 20123:18 pm

      haha from now on, i will definitely listen to experienced selfish seamstresses! :)

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